“Hey unloving, I will love you.”
And this is what I had to say today to our kids:
“So let me get this straight…God did all of this…on his own? Nobody helped him? No!? That’s crazy talk. He has to be pretty powerful to do that, huh? Can any of you do that...I don’t think so. Last night, at fire circle, we talked about a director being the one who calls the shots for a movie or for a play. He is the guy who tells people when to come in and he is the one who yells, “ACTION.” If there weren’t someone to tell people when to come in and when to say their line, do you think that things would work out like they should? No, because they have no direction. They do not know where to go. God is our director. He created all things and everything in this earth. He knew exactly how to make things. He made everything at just the right point and in a specific way for a reason. He knows what is best for all of us and which way to put us into direction. God knows all about each and everyone of you. Did you know that he even knows how many hairs are on your head? That’s a pretty cool thing. And because he knows us so well, he wants us to follow his way because he does have a life for us to follow.”
Funny how what we teach the kids is also so hard for us. Funny how God has this life in his hands. Funny how God did so much to perfect this world, this earth, just so we could even graze it with our presence. Did God need us here? Nope, but he wanted us here. Did he need any wildlife here? Nope, but that’s what he wanted. He could have created this earth so nothing would ever survive, but every little thing he did was to keep us all alive. He built this earth so that we may live, so that he might have a relationship with us. And could he have let all of us die and suffer…yes…but did he? No. He wanted us so bad. He wanted a relationship so bad that he let his own son die in our place. Who are we to say that God has no rule over our lives? Who are we to say that we are bigger than him? Who are we to say, yeah, I can take this on my own…we are nothing compared to God. He is the biggest and greatest and we must only become smaller and smaller. He did this all for us. He does not need us at all. He could get along just fine without us. Yet, we still act like we are all that. We still act like we got all of this. We still act like we are so much bigger and that he will never be able to go on. Reality check, we’re not. Quit trying to do this thing on your own. When he says, “Go,” then go. It is time for us to get over ourselves and to just submit. God is in control and he has everything in the palm of his hands, so we just need to do it. We can trust him, he obviously wants us here or he wouldn’t have done all the things that he has done to keep us here. He loved us first.
And lastly, I have started to understand Jesus more since I have been here. As I was working today, the song “Some Will Seek Forgiveness” came on and I saw a great vision of Jesus Christ. As I was listening to it, I thought of all these things that we put on ourselves. All these names, all these labels, all these things that we think that we are, but the truth of it is, we are something completely different in his eyes. We do not have to be the person we hate so much. He wants to guide us, he wants to lead us, and he wants to fill us up with his love. He wants to fill us up with all the things that we find ourselves inadequate in and wants that to change our lives. In Him, we are beautiful. In Him, we got this. In Him, we are so much more than without him.
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
God of This City
You're the God of this city. You're the King of these people. You are the Lord of this nation, you are...
God is so much bigger than anything that we could ever imagine. He is so much bigger than our hurt, than our pain. He is so much bigger than our tears. He is so much bigger than our insecurities or what we have been through. He is bigger than anything that will ever bring us down. He is working through us and wants to see his love be shown. He wants us to work through the insecurities that we have. He wants us to work throught the pain that we have. He wants to work through the tears that we shed. He wants to take that and he wants to use it for the most miraculous things that he can ever use.
We sit here and we are in pain for these kids we see. We sit here and we hurt for those around us. We sit here and suffer for them on the inside. We wish that we could take away their pain and their hurt. We wish that we can take on their burdens. We wish that we could take their tears and make them our own, but let's be honest, we can't. That is not our place. That is not what God wants to use us for. Does he have the power to take away their pain? Yes, he does. Does he have the power to fix it? Yes, he does. But...that is not his plan.
As we sit here and pray for their lives to be changed, for them to not be in pain the next day, for them to not have to worry about going back home...we forget about one thing...God. He can change these things and I wish that all the evil in the world could be destroyed, but it exists and will exist. This is not God's doing and his heart does break for it, but it is not for it to be fixed, but used. So why are we here? Why do we preach the Good News that does not seem so good sometimes when we have people in pain like this? Because it is good! It is what we need! It is the double edged sword that can pierce anything and God is using it in our lives! It is not on us, we cannot take this on us! God wants to use us here. He wants to use us to show these kids that even though life might not be so great and that it may hurt sometimes or even all the time...He still reigns! He is still the strongman! He is still the one who is overcoming. God is alive and well! God is good and God is in pain for these kids. His heart breaks for them and he wants them. He wants to use them. He wants to take their pain and their hurt to show the world what such a big God can do. He wants to show the world that even through weakness, pain, and suffering that he does do good. He wants to show them that strength comes through weakness and that strength can shine God's light brighter than any light we may ever come in contact with.
God does have so much for these cities surrounding us. He has so much in store for them and he is using people every single day to show his love and his light to them. He is using people every single day to take truth where truth was never before accepted. He is using people every single day to go and speak light into the darkness where light has never ever ever ever reached before. He is using his number one soldiers out on the front line to fight this battle. Satan is already defeated, he cannot do anything. He's got nothing on us and that is a beautiful thing. All these kids that are here with us today and throughout this week are seeing that. They are seeing how God lives out in our lives and how he loves us more than we can ever imagine. They are seeing how God has captured us and is holding us so tight and how AWESOME that is. God is alive in our hearts and he is living through us. So take that Satan! We are getting our cities back and I can see these kids. I can see that there are so many greater things to be done in these cities, through them. They are being raised up to be the most powerful tools that our Christian army need. So, WHAT'S UP.
I am excited. I can feel God. I can feel him moving in us. I can feel his love pouring on us. I can see us getting torn down and that is a sign of God truly working. Where the Spirit is working there a battle is surely waiting. We're are taking on that battle...so bring it on.
God is so much bigger than anything that we could ever imagine. He is so much bigger than our hurt, than our pain. He is so much bigger than our tears. He is so much bigger than our insecurities or what we have been through. He is bigger than anything that will ever bring us down. He is working through us and wants to see his love be shown. He wants us to work through the insecurities that we have. He wants us to work throught the pain that we have. He wants to work through the tears that we shed. He wants to take that and he wants to use it for the most miraculous things that he can ever use.
We sit here and we are in pain for these kids we see. We sit here and we hurt for those around us. We sit here and suffer for them on the inside. We wish that we could take away their pain and their hurt. We wish that we can take on their burdens. We wish that we could take their tears and make them our own, but let's be honest, we can't. That is not our place. That is not what God wants to use us for. Does he have the power to take away their pain? Yes, he does. Does he have the power to fix it? Yes, he does. But...that is not his plan.
As we sit here and pray for their lives to be changed, for them to not be in pain the next day, for them to not have to worry about going back home...we forget about one thing...God. He can change these things and I wish that all the evil in the world could be destroyed, but it exists and will exist. This is not God's doing and his heart does break for it, but it is not for it to be fixed, but used. So why are we here? Why do we preach the Good News that does not seem so good sometimes when we have people in pain like this? Because it is good! It is what we need! It is the double edged sword that can pierce anything and God is using it in our lives! It is not on us, we cannot take this on us! God wants to use us here. He wants to use us to show these kids that even though life might not be so great and that it may hurt sometimes or even all the time...He still reigns! He is still the strongman! He is still the one who is overcoming. God is alive and well! God is good and God is in pain for these kids. His heart breaks for them and he wants them. He wants to use them. He wants to take their pain and their hurt to show the world what such a big God can do. He wants to show the world that even through weakness, pain, and suffering that he does do good. He wants to show them that strength comes through weakness and that strength can shine God's light brighter than any light we may ever come in contact with.
God does have so much for these cities surrounding us. He has so much in store for them and he is using people every single day to show his love and his light to them. He is using people every single day to take truth where truth was never before accepted. He is using people every single day to go and speak light into the darkness where light has never ever ever ever reached before. He is using his number one soldiers out on the front line to fight this battle. Satan is already defeated, he cannot do anything. He's got nothing on us and that is a beautiful thing. All these kids that are here with us today and throughout this week are seeing that. They are seeing how God lives out in our lives and how he loves us more than we can ever imagine. They are seeing how God has captured us and is holding us so tight and how AWESOME that is. God is alive in our hearts and he is living through us. So take that Satan! We are getting our cities back and I can see these kids. I can see that there are so many greater things to be done in these cities, through them. They are being raised up to be the most powerful tools that our Christian army need. So, WHAT'S UP.
I am excited. I can feel God. I can feel him moving in us. I can feel his love pouring on us. I can see us getting torn down and that is a sign of God truly working. Where the Spirit is working there a battle is surely waiting. We're are taking on that battle...so bring it on.
Friday, June 25, 2010
I have this friend...
I know it has been a while since I have said what's up to the world and I am sorry for that world...my apologies...this is what is going on though...
Today has been a long day. A very unproductive and long day at that. The campers come next week and I feel very stressed and very pressured. I feel as though I will not get anything done...even though I have been working my butt off. It just seems like it is neverending and that the time will never come. I feel so inadequate at times when it comes to my job especially. Certain things that have been said have made me feel like I am not doing this good enough. They make me feel like I am not the right person for the job. They make me feel like trash, let's be honest. However, I do have the encouraging side of things as well. I do have the people building me up and being real with me. I do have the friends who are pulling me out and helping me out. I do have the friends who are pushing me and stretching me, but even so, it seems like the bad is outweighing the good. I just want reassurance that overtakes all the doubts...
Today has been a long day. A very unproductive and long day at that. The campers come next week and I feel very stressed and very pressured. I feel as though I will not get anything done...even though I have been working my butt off. It just seems like it is neverending and that the time will never come. I feel so inadequate at times when it comes to my job especially. Certain things that have been said have made me feel like I am not doing this good enough. They make me feel like I am not the right person for the job. They make me feel like trash, let's be honest. However, I do have the encouraging side of things as well. I do have the people building me up and being real with me. I do have the friends who are pulling me out and helping me out. I do have the friends who are pushing me and stretching me, but even so, it seems like the bad is outweighing the good. I just want reassurance that overtakes all the doubts...
Friday, June 11, 2010
Since June 4th
June 4, 2010
Today, I honestly felt kind of useless. I was doing work, but I felt like everything I did was so unaccomplished. I just couldn’t get myself motivated. Every time I tried to work, I just felt this burden of not wanting to. As I look into it more, I realized that my day did not start off as it usually does. I did not get a chance to spend time in the Word because I was so tired from last night. I just could not get up today. This sets off my schedule immensely.
However, later on in my day, I realized that I needed to do something about this. I needed to change my attitude and really focus on God. I decided that work was not going to get done effectively at the rate I was going and I needed to just go and be with the Lord. So, that’s what I did. It was time for me to go and be with God and let Him work in me and speak through me. I left the office to go and be in silence. I went back to the lodge and sat out on the picnic table facing the mountains. As I sat there, I let God speak to me, I let him open up my heart and my eyes to see what he wanted me to see. “God is my shield, saying those whose hearts are true and right. God is a judge who is perfectly fair, he is angry with the wicked everyday,” Psalm 7:10-11. God is a fair judge. He is a just God. He puts a shield around those who have hearts that are true and right. He protects us. He keeps us safe. I’m going to be running into a lot of tough problems this summer. There are going to be a lot of questions that are going to be asked. There are going to be a lot of “why does it have to be this way for them?” This is what I need to remember, that God is just. He believes in justice and wants to see justice. It is not God to blame for the wicked, but it is the wicked to blame for the wicked. God is all powerful and he does perform miracles, but this is still a fallen world.
As I have been out here, I have had more and more appreciation for what is around me. I have loved being outside and seeing God’s beauty. As I sit there and watch creation while I read God’s Word, it all becomes so much more real to me. I have been reading through the creation story, preparing for one of the lessons and I can just see God in everything around me. I am constantly reminded of how he really did make all of this. This is really all of his. This is God’s beauty. Not only that, but even with being with the people I am with. I am constantly reminded of God and who he is. Having small conversations, watching how people act around others, all of this shows how creative and how beautiful God truly is. When I look into people and truly see God, I am amazed. I am in awe of our creator. Then, I think this, how could I not be in awe of our creator after looking at these people? How can I not be in awe of our creator after seeing how well we interact with one another and how each of gifts fit in perfectly in the whole puzzle? Only God can do that. That is awesome in every sense of the word. It’s the little things that he keeps showing me. The little things that I have always noticed, but need to really pay attention to closer.
June 5, 2010
Today, we are going on a staff camping trip. To be quite honest, I am not so excited about it. I know that I still have a ton to do and that it will be hard to get my mind off of it. However, I also know that I will not be able to enjoy myself if I do not let myself have a good time. I need to remember that as I prepare myself to go. We do have a few hours today to relax and to chill before we actually leave. That is the time that I will be spending preparing my heart to go on this trip. It will be good for us as a team to go on the trip. Even though we do know each other really well already, it will be good to be somewhere other than a work setting. It will be good to have a change of scenery and a refreshed mind that goes along with that. It will be good to be away and to not have to worry about the distractions that we have here. And, it will be good to see a different side of God’s creation.
As I am out there in the wilderness this weekend, I hope that God will reveal himself to me. I am letting myself be opened up to God so that he can work in me. I am opening myself up to silence so that he can speak to me. I am letting my guard down and my walls down so that he can work in me. I am praying that he will take me captive and that he will pour so much into me over this weekend. I am praying that he will take everything that is on my mind and put my focus toward him and him only. I am praying that he will remove whatever is blocking me from him and break all the bondage that keeps me from him. I want God to be working in me and through me. I want to become a new creation and I want to forget the old. What better place than in the middle of nowhere in a tent?
As far as that group goes, I am hoping that we will grow closer together. I am hoping that we establish what we need to establish as a group. I am hoping that God is showing us who we are in the group and how we can be more unified as a group. I am praying that he will bring unity among us and that he will open our eyes to being vulnerable of one another. I am excited to see where God takes us as a group this weekend and to have a little insight of where he wants to take us this summer.
June 6, 2010
Yesterday we left for camping and the campsite we were going to is only an hour and a half away...well, things happened. We had been driving for about an hour and a half and we get to the site…the gate is locked. Okay, well we will just go in through the back way. We drove down the road to the other site to get in, and drive all the way through…there’s no way out, dead end. Then we turned around and start to head out. Adam sees a road that we passed and decides that we should try that one…dead end. Then we just decide to go to another campground. We get back on the road and start to travel to another camp ground. After about thirty or forty minutes, we reach one…not big enough. Then we go to another one…not enough to do. Finally, we reach Mt. Pino…just right. We hike down the trail with our stuff and set up camp, our home for two days…yay. After all this running around, it was about time for dinner…so, we sat around the campfire and hung out until dinner came…what a tiring day.
Today, we woke up and hung out for a bit before eating some breakfast. We finally got some breakfast and waited for Dan to get here to do some team building. Nothing much happened at this campfire, but last night’s campfire was pretty good. We talked a lot about God’s faithfulness in our lives and miracles we have seen him do. However, I must say that some of the conversation was hard to me. As we were talking, some things triggered back to the Taylor accident. It has been four years now, but it still hurts for me. I still have times where I cannot deal with it. I still have times where I break down into tears. I still have times where I cannot bear the burden and the weight of it all. I still have times where I question why. Last night, was one of those times. I was hurting and wanted to cry, but no one here understood. At the same time though, it gave me time to reflect with God and see how he worked in me through that. It helped me to understand why and how it hurts me. It helped me see miracles and how powerful God truly is. So, even though it was hard for me, it was still good for me. God was definitely preparing my heart through last night’s conversation. He was getting me ready for talking about hard things. He was getting me ready for dealing with my struggles, my emotions, my pain. And even though it was uncomfortable, it was still good for me.
We did some team building following breakfast. I am not much of a teambuilding person. In fact, I do not really like team building activities. That is just how I am and I know that I need to get over it. So, I did. I did the team building activities and I did not get very much out of it. But, there was one thing that was addressed during a debriefing session. We talked about the issue of sarcasm on the team. Now, most (minus one) of the team is sarcastic. We all like to be sarcastic and we all like to have a good time. However, at the same time, we know how to be serious when we need to be. Even so, our sarcasm can get out of hand sometimes. Sometimes, it can be taken the wrong way and can be seen as a put down. So, we had to work this out as a group and we talked a lot about how if it brings down our brother or sister in Christ, that we should not do it. That was a good thing to discover about the team and to help us when working together in unity.
June 7, 2010
Before we left to come home today, we spent two hours of solo time with Jesus. I went up to the rocks where we did team building yesterday. As I sat there, I began to think of all the people who have really had an influence in my life and my faith walk. It was good to see what I have learned from them and where I have been stretched and challenged. Also, I had a good conversation with God about my struggles. I struggle sometimes with who God puts in my life. I struggle sometimes with being stability for people and not always having a stable person in my own life. I struggle sometimes with having to be the strong one and with not always having a person to be the strong one for me. I struggle sometimes with God speaking through me into people’s lives that are hurting and are literally living through hell. All of this, I struggle with, but at the same time, I know that I have been blessed immensely. God has shown me what it means to look at people through his eyes. He has shown me what it means to carry the burdens of others and how we are supposed to come alongside of others. He has shown me to look at the gray areas and see where things are not so black and white. He has shown me how to step back and look at things from a different point of view. He has shown me to love with his love and with his heart and not to disregard people because of who they are or where they come from. I struggle when he tells me what to do with these gifts he has given me, but I struggle because I do not let him fill me up. I do not let him pour his love into me. I do not let him fill my cup so that it might overflow onto those around me. I try to handle it on my own sometimes and do not let God work through me and take the burdens, but I try to take the burdens on my own. This is something that I need to work on especially this summer. I need to let God be filling up my cup. I need to let God be pouring into me so that I will overflow with his love.
Heidi and I did have a good conversation yesterday as well that made me really think. As we were hiking down the mountain, I started to tell her about my semester. We talked about how I was extremely depressed this past semester and how I did not want anyone in my life. We talked about Amy and how I never really dealt with it, but just continued to go on with my life. I never dealt with it. I never stopped and processed. I never let God heal me or work in me. I just kept going, pushing myself to take care of others. God said to me yesterday, “Be still and know that I am God.” Be still, stop, and know that he is bigger than anything that I have dealt with in my life. He is bigger than anything that I have ever come in contact with. He is God, he can work through this and wants to work through this. He wants to heal me and take care of me. He wants to comfort me and encourage me.
June 8, 2010
Time is starting to get pretty tight as we have counselors coming in tomorrow and we have week in the city next week. I am ahead of schedule, but not enough ahead of schedule. I feel like I have so much to do and not enough time to do any of it. I have today and tomorrow to do stuff and then the afternoon on Friday, but we leave on Saturday. So, we will see how things will work out. All of my lessons are planned as of now and most of the devo books are done, but the thing is that I still have to figure out what to do with the L.I.Ts when they get here. So, there is a lot of planning in that area still. I will get it done, but I do not know when. That is okay though, getting stressed will not be a smart thing. I know that I need to relax and just chill out and go with the flow. It just means that I have to work much harder and much longer the days that I do have time to do work. After all, it will pay off in the end.
Today, I started to work on the high school devotionals. I feel like these ones come a lot easier than the younger ones. After doing the first two, I start to see where this is supposed to go and how I should direct it. This means that I probably need to go back and readjust the younger ones, but that is okay. It’s not about me, but it is about the kids. It is about what God wants to teach the kids. I think this is what I am most nervous about, I have been listening to God and allowing him to speak to me, but I so often let the lies get to me. I let the lies tell me that I did not hear correctly. I let the lies tell me that I am not good enough or that what I am doing is not good enough. Even though I know the truth about this, it does not keep me from at least listening to the lies. After a while, all I can do is let the lies get to me. However, this is where I do need to let God overcome. I need to rebuke those and let him defeat them for me. It is through him that truth comes and that is what I need to focus on. It is all God who is going to take this battle, not me.
June 9, 2010
Last night ended up being a pretty fun night. Adam needed some people to drive into LA to pick up the boat driver for the camp. Seeing how there was free Taco Bell in it for us, we naturally volunteered. It is times like these that I have loved so far at camp. It is not the forced hang out get to know the staff times, but the “hey, can you go do this and take a friend times.” It is through these times that we have had the best team bonding. It is through these times of not forced get to know you conversations that we have had the best conversations. It is through these non-formal just hang out times that we have had some challenging times and some stretching times. It is through this, that we have been able to build each other up and encourage one another. I know that it has only been a week that we have been together, but we have come close together. We have been open and real with one another. We have allowed God to work in each other through us. We have shared our struggles and been able to hold one another accountable. We have already had those arguments that we need to work through. We will have more and we will have more good times. That is what is so beautiful about coming together as a community of CHRISTIANS: we all have one thing in common and that is what holds us together. So, we may have disputes, we may have fights, but we do love each other as brothers and sisters in Christ and that is what sets us apart.
Today, the counselors arrived and I am pretty excited about that. I am pumped for Alissa to be here and glad for her to have this experience. It is good to have people from back home here just because I know they will be back at school with me when I return. They are not my safety net here and I do not plan on spending a ton of time with them, but I do plan to invest in our friendships while we are here. I do want us to grow stronger and build more trust in each other so that when we do get back to school we will be able to debrief and to be real with each other. I am looking forward to seeing where God takes Alissa, Liz, and me. I am excited to see how he uses each of us in each other’s lives and when we get back to Taylor. We all are here for a reason and for different reasons at that and I am pumped to see what fruit comes of that.
June 10, 2010
We had team building activities all morning this morning. I am not going to lie, I was not too excited about it, not because I did not want to do it (which I really did not), but because I knew how much stuff I had to do. We got there and it started off pretty terrible. The guy leading chewed us out because we were late, which made me not want to do things even more, but as the time went on, I got over it. We started off with this game of “telephone.” Jared (our leader) put some items a bit of a distance away from us in a pattern. We had to, one by one, go down and look at his pattern he created and then run down and relay to the person at the end of the line what it was. The person at the end of the line passed it on to the next person and then the next and the next until it reached the first person. The person at the front of the line had to use the items in front of them to duplicate the pattern that was explained to them. It was a long game, but quite entertaining. I must say that my feelings eased up by the end of it. We finished up the game and sat in a circle to talk about how it is related to life and further how it is related to Ephesians 4:23-24 (our theme verse). As corny as it sounded, it actually was really good to talk about. It helped us to see how the verse relates to our everyday lives, especially know that we are Christians.
We finished up team building and headed to lunch and then to three hours worth of meetings. Let us just say that the meetings were so lame that my supervisor was texting me during the meetings. However, it kept me entertained, so I was okay with it. It is just really hard to go to meetings about things that you know because you have been living here. So to be oriented after living here for a while is not that fun. However, it did not kill me, so it must have made me stronger. I feel like I can do anything now that I sat through those meetings, thank you so much for making me.
The day of getting to know one another finished up with shooting one another. Five thirty rolled around and we headed up to the fields for some wings, pizza, and paintball action. It has been quite a while since I have played paintball, but let me tell you what I lit them up last night. I mean except for at the very beginning when I got drilled in the lip, but hey now I can say that I got in a fight or something cool like the. It was a good time and a good time for us to have a break from doing work and to do something that was fun and team bonding such as that. I mean, we have breaks all the time at night, but this was a real organized break and that was definitely needed.
June 11, 2010
Today started out pretty gloomy. We had breakfast and then headed to a seminar about depression, suicide, and abuse. Not really the way that I wanted to start out my day, but it does need to be addressed at some point. As I was sitting there, it did bring a lot back to me though. I did have a lot of memories about what it is like to be young and to be young and depressed at that. Now that I look back on all that and as I sat there today, I realized how much I do have to offer to kids who are going through that. I understand what that is like and I understand how it feels to be depressed at that age. I understand what it means to not want to go to school or how there is that one last straw that breaks the camel’s back. That can help me and at the time and even after I got over it, I felt like such a loser for ever feeling that way, but now I realize that good can come out of it. It can help me help others and God’s light can truly shine because of it. God did work through all of that and he has helped me deal with it and that is what the beauty of it all is. I can help others see that same beauty.
Following all of that, I needed to continue to work on devotions for senior high and junior high camps. As I wrote the devotionals for the camps, I really got to thinking about how big God truly is. I mean, I know this and I have thought about this before, but I have never until now let it take my breath away the way that it did. As I wrote about God being the director of our lives, I could not get it out of my mind that God spoke…and it happened. He did nothing but merely speak and it happened. Nothing more, nothing less, but speak. Seriously, that takes my breath away. It is so cool to think that our God is so big and so powerful that all he has to do is speak and things fall into place. All he has to do is say that he wants something and it happens. All he has to do is command and BAM! That is incredible to me, why can’t I do that? Oh yeah, I am not God. Which is another thing that has been good to bring back into perspective
Today, I honestly felt kind of useless. I was doing work, but I felt like everything I did was so unaccomplished. I just couldn’t get myself motivated. Every time I tried to work, I just felt this burden of not wanting to. As I look into it more, I realized that my day did not start off as it usually does. I did not get a chance to spend time in the Word because I was so tired from last night. I just could not get up today. This sets off my schedule immensely.
However, later on in my day, I realized that I needed to do something about this. I needed to change my attitude and really focus on God. I decided that work was not going to get done effectively at the rate I was going and I needed to just go and be with the Lord. So, that’s what I did. It was time for me to go and be with God and let Him work in me and speak through me. I left the office to go and be in silence. I went back to the lodge and sat out on the picnic table facing the mountains. As I sat there, I let God speak to me, I let him open up my heart and my eyes to see what he wanted me to see. “God is my shield, saying those whose hearts are true and right. God is a judge who is perfectly fair, he is angry with the wicked everyday,” Psalm 7:10-11. God is a fair judge. He is a just God. He puts a shield around those who have hearts that are true and right. He protects us. He keeps us safe. I’m going to be running into a lot of tough problems this summer. There are going to be a lot of questions that are going to be asked. There are going to be a lot of “why does it have to be this way for them?” This is what I need to remember, that God is just. He believes in justice and wants to see justice. It is not God to blame for the wicked, but it is the wicked to blame for the wicked. God is all powerful and he does perform miracles, but this is still a fallen world.
As I have been out here, I have had more and more appreciation for what is around me. I have loved being outside and seeing God’s beauty. As I sit there and watch creation while I read God’s Word, it all becomes so much more real to me. I have been reading through the creation story, preparing for one of the lessons and I can just see God in everything around me. I am constantly reminded of how he really did make all of this. This is really all of his. This is God’s beauty. Not only that, but even with being with the people I am with. I am constantly reminded of God and who he is. Having small conversations, watching how people act around others, all of this shows how creative and how beautiful God truly is. When I look into people and truly see God, I am amazed. I am in awe of our creator. Then, I think this, how could I not be in awe of our creator after looking at these people? How can I not be in awe of our creator after seeing how well we interact with one another and how each of gifts fit in perfectly in the whole puzzle? Only God can do that. That is awesome in every sense of the word. It’s the little things that he keeps showing me. The little things that I have always noticed, but need to really pay attention to closer.
June 5, 2010
Today, we are going on a staff camping trip. To be quite honest, I am not so excited about it. I know that I still have a ton to do and that it will be hard to get my mind off of it. However, I also know that I will not be able to enjoy myself if I do not let myself have a good time. I need to remember that as I prepare myself to go. We do have a few hours today to relax and to chill before we actually leave. That is the time that I will be spending preparing my heart to go on this trip. It will be good for us as a team to go on the trip. Even though we do know each other really well already, it will be good to be somewhere other than a work setting. It will be good to have a change of scenery and a refreshed mind that goes along with that. It will be good to be away and to not have to worry about the distractions that we have here. And, it will be good to see a different side of God’s creation.
As I am out there in the wilderness this weekend, I hope that God will reveal himself to me. I am letting myself be opened up to God so that he can work in me. I am opening myself up to silence so that he can speak to me. I am letting my guard down and my walls down so that he can work in me. I am praying that he will take me captive and that he will pour so much into me over this weekend. I am praying that he will take everything that is on my mind and put my focus toward him and him only. I am praying that he will remove whatever is blocking me from him and break all the bondage that keeps me from him. I want God to be working in me and through me. I want to become a new creation and I want to forget the old. What better place than in the middle of nowhere in a tent?
As far as that group goes, I am hoping that we will grow closer together. I am hoping that we establish what we need to establish as a group. I am hoping that God is showing us who we are in the group and how we can be more unified as a group. I am praying that he will bring unity among us and that he will open our eyes to being vulnerable of one another. I am excited to see where God takes us as a group this weekend and to have a little insight of where he wants to take us this summer.
June 6, 2010
Yesterday we left for camping and the campsite we were going to is only an hour and a half away...well, things happened. We had been driving for about an hour and a half and we get to the site…the gate is locked. Okay, well we will just go in through the back way. We drove down the road to the other site to get in, and drive all the way through…there’s no way out, dead end. Then we turned around and start to head out. Adam sees a road that we passed and decides that we should try that one…dead end. Then we just decide to go to another campground. We get back on the road and start to travel to another camp ground. After about thirty or forty minutes, we reach one…not big enough. Then we go to another one…not enough to do. Finally, we reach Mt. Pino…just right. We hike down the trail with our stuff and set up camp, our home for two days…yay. After all this running around, it was about time for dinner…so, we sat around the campfire and hung out until dinner came…what a tiring day.
Today, we woke up and hung out for a bit before eating some breakfast. We finally got some breakfast and waited for Dan to get here to do some team building. Nothing much happened at this campfire, but last night’s campfire was pretty good. We talked a lot about God’s faithfulness in our lives and miracles we have seen him do. However, I must say that some of the conversation was hard to me. As we were talking, some things triggered back to the Taylor accident. It has been four years now, but it still hurts for me. I still have times where I cannot deal with it. I still have times where I break down into tears. I still have times where I cannot bear the burden and the weight of it all. I still have times where I question why. Last night, was one of those times. I was hurting and wanted to cry, but no one here understood. At the same time though, it gave me time to reflect with God and see how he worked in me through that. It helped me to understand why and how it hurts me. It helped me see miracles and how powerful God truly is. So, even though it was hard for me, it was still good for me. God was definitely preparing my heart through last night’s conversation. He was getting me ready for talking about hard things. He was getting me ready for dealing with my struggles, my emotions, my pain. And even though it was uncomfortable, it was still good for me.
We did some team building following breakfast. I am not much of a teambuilding person. In fact, I do not really like team building activities. That is just how I am and I know that I need to get over it. So, I did. I did the team building activities and I did not get very much out of it. But, there was one thing that was addressed during a debriefing session. We talked about the issue of sarcasm on the team. Now, most (minus one) of the team is sarcastic. We all like to be sarcastic and we all like to have a good time. However, at the same time, we know how to be serious when we need to be. Even so, our sarcasm can get out of hand sometimes. Sometimes, it can be taken the wrong way and can be seen as a put down. So, we had to work this out as a group and we talked a lot about how if it brings down our brother or sister in Christ, that we should not do it. That was a good thing to discover about the team and to help us when working together in unity.
June 7, 2010
Before we left to come home today, we spent two hours of solo time with Jesus. I went up to the rocks where we did team building yesterday. As I sat there, I began to think of all the people who have really had an influence in my life and my faith walk. It was good to see what I have learned from them and where I have been stretched and challenged. Also, I had a good conversation with God about my struggles. I struggle sometimes with who God puts in my life. I struggle sometimes with being stability for people and not always having a stable person in my own life. I struggle sometimes with having to be the strong one and with not always having a person to be the strong one for me. I struggle sometimes with God speaking through me into people’s lives that are hurting and are literally living through hell. All of this, I struggle with, but at the same time, I know that I have been blessed immensely. God has shown me what it means to look at people through his eyes. He has shown me what it means to carry the burdens of others and how we are supposed to come alongside of others. He has shown me to look at the gray areas and see where things are not so black and white. He has shown me how to step back and look at things from a different point of view. He has shown me to love with his love and with his heart and not to disregard people because of who they are or where they come from. I struggle when he tells me what to do with these gifts he has given me, but I struggle because I do not let him fill me up. I do not let him pour his love into me. I do not let him fill my cup so that it might overflow onto those around me. I try to handle it on my own sometimes and do not let God work through me and take the burdens, but I try to take the burdens on my own. This is something that I need to work on especially this summer. I need to let God be filling up my cup. I need to let God be pouring into me so that I will overflow with his love.
Heidi and I did have a good conversation yesterday as well that made me really think. As we were hiking down the mountain, I started to tell her about my semester. We talked about how I was extremely depressed this past semester and how I did not want anyone in my life. We talked about Amy and how I never really dealt with it, but just continued to go on with my life. I never dealt with it. I never stopped and processed. I never let God heal me or work in me. I just kept going, pushing myself to take care of others. God said to me yesterday, “Be still and know that I am God.” Be still, stop, and know that he is bigger than anything that I have dealt with in my life. He is bigger than anything that I have ever come in contact with. He is God, he can work through this and wants to work through this. He wants to heal me and take care of me. He wants to comfort me and encourage me.
June 8, 2010
Time is starting to get pretty tight as we have counselors coming in tomorrow and we have week in the city next week. I am ahead of schedule, but not enough ahead of schedule. I feel like I have so much to do and not enough time to do any of it. I have today and tomorrow to do stuff and then the afternoon on Friday, but we leave on Saturday. So, we will see how things will work out. All of my lessons are planned as of now and most of the devo books are done, but the thing is that I still have to figure out what to do with the L.I.Ts when they get here. So, there is a lot of planning in that area still. I will get it done, but I do not know when. That is okay though, getting stressed will not be a smart thing. I know that I need to relax and just chill out and go with the flow. It just means that I have to work much harder and much longer the days that I do have time to do work. After all, it will pay off in the end.
Today, I started to work on the high school devotionals. I feel like these ones come a lot easier than the younger ones. After doing the first two, I start to see where this is supposed to go and how I should direct it. This means that I probably need to go back and readjust the younger ones, but that is okay. It’s not about me, but it is about the kids. It is about what God wants to teach the kids. I think this is what I am most nervous about, I have been listening to God and allowing him to speak to me, but I so often let the lies get to me. I let the lies tell me that I did not hear correctly. I let the lies tell me that I am not good enough or that what I am doing is not good enough. Even though I know the truth about this, it does not keep me from at least listening to the lies. After a while, all I can do is let the lies get to me. However, this is where I do need to let God overcome. I need to rebuke those and let him defeat them for me. It is through him that truth comes and that is what I need to focus on. It is all God who is going to take this battle, not me.
June 9, 2010
Last night ended up being a pretty fun night. Adam needed some people to drive into LA to pick up the boat driver for the camp. Seeing how there was free Taco Bell in it for us, we naturally volunteered. It is times like these that I have loved so far at camp. It is not the forced hang out get to know the staff times, but the “hey, can you go do this and take a friend times.” It is through these times that we have had the best team bonding. It is through these times of not forced get to know you conversations that we have had the best conversations. It is through these non-formal just hang out times that we have had some challenging times and some stretching times. It is through this, that we have been able to build each other up and encourage one another. I know that it has only been a week that we have been together, but we have come close together. We have been open and real with one another. We have allowed God to work in each other through us. We have shared our struggles and been able to hold one another accountable. We have already had those arguments that we need to work through. We will have more and we will have more good times. That is what is so beautiful about coming together as a community of CHRISTIANS: we all have one thing in common and that is what holds us together. So, we may have disputes, we may have fights, but we do love each other as brothers and sisters in Christ and that is what sets us apart.
Today, the counselors arrived and I am pretty excited about that. I am pumped for Alissa to be here and glad for her to have this experience. It is good to have people from back home here just because I know they will be back at school with me when I return. They are not my safety net here and I do not plan on spending a ton of time with them, but I do plan to invest in our friendships while we are here. I do want us to grow stronger and build more trust in each other so that when we do get back to school we will be able to debrief and to be real with each other. I am looking forward to seeing where God takes Alissa, Liz, and me. I am excited to see how he uses each of us in each other’s lives and when we get back to Taylor. We all are here for a reason and for different reasons at that and I am pumped to see what fruit comes of that.
June 10, 2010
We had team building activities all morning this morning. I am not going to lie, I was not too excited about it, not because I did not want to do it (which I really did not), but because I knew how much stuff I had to do. We got there and it started off pretty terrible. The guy leading chewed us out because we were late, which made me not want to do things even more, but as the time went on, I got over it. We started off with this game of “telephone.” Jared (our leader) put some items a bit of a distance away from us in a pattern. We had to, one by one, go down and look at his pattern he created and then run down and relay to the person at the end of the line what it was. The person at the end of the line passed it on to the next person and then the next and the next until it reached the first person. The person at the front of the line had to use the items in front of them to duplicate the pattern that was explained to them. It was a long game, but quite entertaining. I must say that my feelings eased up by the end of it. We finished up the game and sat in a circle to talk about how it is related to life and further how it is related to Ephesians 4:23-24 (our theme verse). As corny as it sounded, it actually was really good to talk about. It helped us to see how the verse relates to our everyday lives, especially know that we are Christians.
We finished up team building and headed to lunch and then to three hours worth of meetings. Let us just say that the meetings were so lame that my supervisor was texting me during the meetings. However, it kept me entertained, so I was okay with it. It is just really hard to go to meetings about things that you know because you have been living here. So to be oriented after living here for a while is not that fun. However, it did not kill me, so it must have made me stronger. I feel like I can do anything now that I sat through those meetings, thank you so much for making me.
The day of getting to know one another finished up with shooting one another. Five thirty rolled around and we headed up to the fields for some wings, pizza, and paintball action. It has been quite a while since I have played paintball, but let me tell you what I lit them up last night. I mean except for at the very beginning when I got drilled in the lip, but hey now I can say that I got in a fight or something cool like the. It was a good time and a good time for us to have a break from doing work and to do something that was fun and team bonding such as that. I mean, we have breaks all the time at night, but this was a real organized break and that was definitely needed.
June 11, 2010
Today started out pretty gloomy. We had breakfast and then headed to a seminar about depression, suicide, and abuse. Not really the way that I wanted to start out my day, but it does need to be addressed at some point. As I was sitting there, it did bring a lot back to me though. I did have a lot of memories about what it is like to be young and to be young and depressed at that. Now that I look back on all that and as I sat there today, I realized how much I do have to offer to kids who are going through that. I understand what that is like and I understand how it feels to be depressed at that age. I understand what it means to not want to go to school or how there is that one last straw that breaks the camel’s back. That can help me and at the time and even after I got over it, I felt like such a loser for ever feeling that way, but now I realize that good can come out of it. It can help me help others and God’s light can truly shine because of it. God did work through all of that and he has helped me deal with it and that is what the beauty of it all is. I can help others see that same beauty.
Following all of that, I needed to continue to work on devotions for senior high and junior high camps. As I wrote the devotionals for the camps, I really got to thinking about how big God truly is. I mean, I know this and I have thought about this before, but I have never until now let it take my breath away the way that it did. As I wrote about God being the director of our lives, I could not get it out of my mind that God spoke…and it happened. He did nothing but merely speak and it happened. Nothing more, nothing less, but speak. Seriously, that takes my breath away. It is so cool to think that our God is so big and so powerful that all he has to do is speak and things fall into place. All he has to do is say that he wants something and it happens. All he has to do is command and BAM! That is incredible to me, why can’t I do that? Oh yeah, I am not God. Which is another thing that has been good to bring back into perspective
Friday, June 4, 2010
In His Presence
So I just get to sleep last night...it's about 11pm. I'm having a nice, quiet, sleep when at about 2AM I hear these dudes YELLIN. Apparently, the new group got here. It was 2AM!!! I was just trying to get some peaceful rest before having to start the day off at 7 AM! It's cool though, it's cool....who needs sleep anyway before a 8 hour day? So this group, "In His Presence" is freaking huge, I am pretty sure that they are all body builders. There's no doubt that some of them have steroids for every meal...I mean HUGE. Thank you, "In His Presence" for making my life so interesting.
We finished off the day yesterday with a little bit of archery up at the range. I kind of felt like Robin Hood, but only better. I mean, I am that good. Seriously though, it was a great time. Welcome to my life.
As for today, praise the Lord that it is Friday. I am ready to have the weekend. This week has been jammed pack of so much work and it's nice to have a little breather. I am going to have to do a little bit of work considering we are going camping on Sunday through Tuesday and then we have the week in the City the following week, but at least a bit of a break will be nice. Tonight, I think a few of us are going to head to Lancaster to see a movie and be away for a bit. It will be nice to relax...I'm all about relaxing...
We finished off the day yesterday with a little bit of archery up at the range. I kind of felt like Robin Hood, but only better. I mean, I am that good. Seriously though, it was a great time. Welcome to my life.
As for today, praise the Lord that it is Friday. I am ready to have the weekend. This week has been jammed pack of so much work and it's nice to have a little breather. I am going to have to do a little bit of work considering we are going camping on Sunday through Tuesday and then we have the week in the City the following week, but at least a bit of a break will be nice. Tonight, I think a few of us are going to head to Lancaster to see a movie and be away for a bit. It will be nice to relax...I'm all about relaxing...
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Boring Day.
Today has been a day of a lot of nothing it feels like. However, I have been doing a ton of stuff, funny how that works out. I have been sitting in an office all day working on a devotional booklet for first through third graders. I mean, I got it done, but have no fear… I still have fourth through sixth, junior high, and high school to go. Even though it has been an extremely long day, I have enjoyed it. It has been good to work in peace and quiet. I have had a lot of time today to really think through what this summer is going to look like as far as devotions and teaching for the kids. So, I am glad that I have had the quiet to do that. However, I am glad that the actual workday is over. It is good to have the rest of the night off to relax and do whatever we want.
We have a camping trip this weekend that we are going on as a staff. I am excited about it because it will be good for us to have some quality hangout time outside of the OAKS. Not only that, but it will be good to see how some of our crew handles camping out. I have a feeling that will be quite amusing for us. As we have spent more and more time together here I have really grown to love our staff. I mean, I have only been here a week tomorrow, but it seems like we have known each other forever by the way that we interact with each other. We are as Heidi would say, “the dysfunctional family.” Heidi even went around and said who each of us is in the dysfunctional family the other day. I am the punk rebellious teenage kid. I might say that I am glad to claim that.
We have a camping trip this weekend that we are going on as a staff. I am excited about it because it will be good for us to have some quality hangout time outside of the OAKS. Not only that, but it will be good to see how some of our crew handles camping out. I have a feeling that will be quite amusing for us. As we have spent more and more time together here I have really grown to love our staff. I mean, I have only been here a week tomorrow, but it seems like we have known each other forever by the way that we interact with each other. We are as Heidi would say, “the dysfunctional family.” Heidi even went around and said who each of us is in the dysfunctional family the other day. I am the punk rebellious teenage kid. I might say that I am glad to claim that.
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Paige Billing
This is a shout out to my girl Paige...
"Ode To Paige"
I remember the day when we met,
There was tool there, how could I ever forget?
We talked just a little bit,
While the tool threw a hissy fit.
At first I was scared of you,
I just did not know what to do.
It was a really hard day,
So I left, without delay.
You were angry at that,
Because, well, I left you with Pat.
I am sorry for that,
For leaving you with a woman like Pat.
One day, you became my real friend,
And now, you'll be here until the end.
You love me and I love you,
Without you, I do not know what I would do.
Paige Billing, I love you.
"Ode To Paige"
I remember the day when we met,
There was tool there, how could I ever forget?
We talked just a little bit,
While the tool threw a hissy fit.
At first I was scared of you,
I just did not know what to do.
It was a really hard day,
So I left, without delay.
You were angry at that,
Because, well, I left you with Pat.
I am sorry for that,
For leaving you with a woman like Pat.
One day, you became my real friend,
And now, you'll be here until the end.
You love me and I love you,
Without you, I do not know what I would do.
Paige Billing, I love you.
Staff Appreciation Day
Today started out pretty typical, I headed out to do my devotions at around seven this morning. I went out on the patio and hung out and really looked at God’s creation. It is so peaceful and wonderful out here. I know that once we get kids, it will not be as peaceful, but I also know that I can find stillness and quiet whenever I need it. I mean, I do live up in the mountains. There is peace everywhere. As I was sitting outside, one verse really caught my eye, “I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.” Ephesians 3:17-19. As I sat there, all I could think of was how big our God is and by looking at his creation around me, I could see how big he really is. And then I thought, he allowed us all to live so that we could experience things like “this.” How could he not have love for us if he allows us to experience so many great things? How could he not have love for us, if he is willing to share his creation with us? How could he not have love for us, if he let us live? I have been experiencing his love out here, through people, through his creation, and for my longing for getting to know him more.
After we had breakfast, I headed to the office to do some work. At first, I started to get a little bit upset with the fact that I was going blank on what to do. I just had a writer’s block every time I tried to think of something and try to write something. However, I finally got on a roll and got it going. At about ten, there was a definite need for a break as we had a “staff appreciation” break. We got some great coffee, bagels, strawberries, and of course…donuts. I might say, that it was the best break that I have had in a long time. However, after about forty minutes, it was time to get back to work. Today ended up being a pretty successful day with working on things. I got all my outlines done for lessons and found skits/activities that I needed for different lessons. All I need to finish now for this week is figure out decorations and start working on devotionals. We’ll see how that all pans out.
After we had breakfast, I headed to the office to do some work. At first, I started to get a little bit upset with the fact that I was going blank on what to do. I just had a writer’s block every time I tried to think of something and try to write something. However, I finally got on a roll and got it going. At about ten, there was a definite need for a break as we had a “staff appreciation” break. We got some great coffee, bagels, strawberries, and of course…donuts. I might say, that it was the best break that I have had in a long time. However, after about forty minutes, it was time to get back to work. Today ended up being a pretty successful day with working on things. I got all my outlines done for lessons and found skits/activities that I needed for different lessons. All I need to finish now for this week is figure out decorations and start working on devotionals. We’ll see how that all pans out.
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
i'm a dinosaur
“Don’t sin by letting anger control you. Think about it overnight and remain silent.”
Psalm 4:4
As I was doing my devotions this morning, I could not go on unless I worked through something first. I sat there reading this verse over and over again and felt God convicting me. Finally, I knew that before I could even go on, I needed work through this to let God working in me. There had been something for over a year that has been holding back part of me from God. It is interesting how things can sometimes overtake so many parts of our lives. It is interesting to see how one little thing can grow over time and take control of thoughts, emotions, and even actions. It is interesting that even when we know that these things are taking us over that sometimes we do not want to just let them go. Letting go is not okay with us because that means that we will have to change. However, there is always a point where we need to start to change. God showed me this today, I need to change. In order to change, I need to let things go and give them completely to him. I am not fooling anyone when I just act like I give them to him, it is time to let them go. What a way to start a day, huh? It is not just done and over though, I still need to be conscious of what I decided and need to continue to work on this area. I need to continue to let God work through this area.
By the time I had wrestled through all of this, it was eight in the morning and time to go grab some breakfast for the day. I headed out get breakfast with the rest of the crew and it was awesome. It was a great time of fellowship and a great time of laughs. I am not going to lie, we all know how to have a great time and I am more than happy for that. God has definitely blessed us with a great staff. It is awesome how well we compliment each other and how we all get along with one another. I absolutely love it.
Even though the last three days have been fun and play for us, we had to get to work today. After I filled out a billion pages of paperwork, Daniel took Liz and I on a grand tour of our camp. Now I have been here for about four days now, but today was the first time that I was actually introduced to anything in the camp. Following our “grand tour,” we headed out to start work on our own personal jobs. I spent most of the time looking through past stuff and seeing what I needed to do for this year. I realized that it is not so easy for me to relate things to elementary kids, but I know that I can do it. It will just take a lot more researching resources and really looking into things. I am more and more excited about my job when I do more things that are actually related to it.
Tonight we finished up with some more games as a staff. We played some Mafia, which were the lamest games of Mafia that I have ever played. Finally, we all gave up on that game and moved to a much better one, Psychiatrist. This game really let us show who we were and it was hilarious to watch people in our group act. I might say that I was thoroughly entertained the whole time.
Psalm 4:4
As I was doing my devotions this morning, I could not go on unless I worked through something first. I sat there reading this verse over and over again and felt God convicting me. Finally, I knew that before I could even go on, I needed work through this to let God working in me. There had been something for over a year that has been holding back part of me from God. It is interesting how things can sometimes overtake so many parts of our lives. It is interesting to see how one little thing can grow over time and take control of thoughts, emotions, and even actions. It is interesting that even when we know that these things are taking us over that sometimes we do not want to just let them go. Letting go is not okay with us because that means that we will have to change. However, there is always a point where we need to start to change. God showed me this today, I need to change. In order to change, I need to let things go and give them completely to him. I am not fooling anyone when I just act like I give them to him, it is time to let them go. What a way to start a day, huh? It is not just done and over though, I still need to be conscious of what I decided and need to continue to work on this area. I need to continue to let God work through this area.
By the time I had wrestled through all of this, it was eight in the morning and time to go grab some breakfast for the day. I headed out get breakfast with the rest of the crew and it was awesome. It was a great time of fellowship and a great time of laughs. I am not going to lie, we all know how to have a great time and I am more than happy for that. God has definitely blessed us with a great staff. It is awesome how well we compliment each other and how we all get along with one another. I absolutely love it.
Even though the last three days have been fun and play for us, we had to get to work today. After I filled out a billion pages of paperwork, Daniel took Liz and I on a grand tour of our camp. Now I have been here for about four days now, but today was the first time that I was actually introduced to anything in the camp. Following our “grand tour,” we headed out to start work on our own personal jobs. I spent most of the time looking through past stuff and seeing what I needed to do for this year. I realized that it is not so easy for me to relate things to elementary kids, but I know that I can do it. It will just take a lot more researching resources and really looking into things. I am more and more excited about my job when I do more things that are actually related to it.
Tonight we finished up with some more games as a staff. We played some Mafia, which were the lamest games of Mafia that I have ever played. Finally, we all gave up on that game and moved to a much better one, Psychiatrist. This game really let us show who we were and it was hilarious to watch people in our group act. I might say that I was thoroughly entertained the whole time.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)