As I sit here, I think of how grateful that am tat I have a loving community around me. And I see the love of God and the hand of God on the people around me. I see Him working through people and Him pouring into people around here. I see His light shining. I see all of this and I see where I am at. The struggles that I have gone through this past weekend and the unrest that resides in my soul because of it. Not an unrest in the sense that I am nervous or scared, but an unrest in what Jesus would do. It is such a lame sounding phrase, but as I sit here and think, it's an intense question.
When a person is in a bind, they need help, they verbally admit that they need help, but they are not willing to take the steps that are needed...is it right to throw them back to where they were before? From my experiences with tough love, I would say that is what needs to be done, but as I look at the holistic Gospel that is the imago dei, is that really what is to be done? I want to say yes, but the truth is that I fall into conflict with myself. Where is my role in this? When am I supposed to step up and intervene with interest of self and what needs to be done? When am I suppose to be protector?
We fall into these what would Jesus do moments every once in a while. It is the moments where you know that something has to be done, but something else inside of you questions if that really was the right thing. It is a battle that strengthens us and that pushes us to really trust in the Lord, but also pushes us in love. The only reason we ever ask ourselves these questions is because of love. It is because we care and we know that there could be something better for a situation. The question is...how do we find the balance between knowing there could be something better, but being alright with not being able to do anything else at the time. And here I am, in another battle where the Lord is taking over my heart. The truth is that I need to be okay with the battle and wrestle with what is going on in order to become even more like Christ.
"On behalf of this man I will boast, but on my own behalf I will not boast, except of my weaknesses. Though if I should wish to boast, I would not be a fool, for I would be speaking the truth. But I refrain from it, so that no one may think more of me than he sees in me or hears from me. So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong."
(2 Corinthians 12:5-10 ESV)
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