LAD3

01/07/11

Matthew 16

“Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it. What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul? For the Son of Man is going to come in his Father’s glory with his angels, and then he will reward each person according to what they have done.
“Truly I tell you, some who are standing here will not taste death before they see the Son of Man coming in his kingdom.”
Matthew 16:24-27

As I have been here, what I feel has happened is that God has shown me more and more of where I am supposed to be. I see more of what I love here and what I am passionate about. I see people that I am in love with and that I want to serve. I see a city that is broken and that I want to help build up. This is apart of my heart.

Moving here, would be great, but at the same time would kill. I mean, like I said, I love the people, I love the city, I love the organizations...but what about the other things I could do? What about travelling the world? What about going to Cambodia? What about all the things that have taken over my heart as well?

And then, this is what comes to my mind... “whoever wants to be my disciple must take up their cross and follow me.” I feel the Holy Spirit on me. I feel God working in my life. I hear him saying, come, follow me. And as I think about that, I realize that is exactly what I must do. I must take up my cross and follow him. I must let go of all the things that I want to do and follow him. I must listen to him and follow him. These are the things that make me a disciple.

Life in LA: Real Day 2

We went to Emmanuel Church this morning. To be completely honest, I fell in love with how they were working in the community. I fell in love with their staff and how honest and upfront they were about things. I fell in love with how God’s hand is moving and how he is working through them. It is such a beautiful thing to see and I was so delighted by that.

The one thing that hit me the most was during one of the speakers talks and he was describing all these different views that people have of churches in the inner city. He gave us examples, but the one that stuck out the most was, the church being a moat and only letting certain people in, but when danger was near drawing up the bridge. This is held closely to my heart because I see this in my own community. I see different churches building a moat and keeping themselves safe. The people that go to the churches are not necessarily the ones who need it. The ones who are inside and on the inside of the moat are good to go. The outside world is at their control and when they decide to let the bridge down. And this is what he said about all the examples, including this one, THIS IS NOT HOW THE CHURCH IS SUPPOSED TO BE! The church is supposed to be loving and caring to those around them. It is supposed to be involved with the community around them. It is supposed to care for them and pour into them and do it because Christ loves them. This is what it means to love God. It means to love his people, no matter who they are or where they come from.

Also, they have started a program called the Compton Initiative. The church goes into Compton, paints people’s houses, and gets them looking nice. They are changing up the place, making it a place that people are proud of. They are helping people by showing Christ’s love through serving them. They are becoming the “good for nothings” and being knocked face down in the dirt. And they are doing all of this because they love their community, they love the people of Compton, but most of all, they love Jesus Christ. It is so amazing to see. I see things like this and my heart gets so excited. I get so pumped up. And not only that, but I see leaders in their church like Alma who have an idea and then it happens...and get excited. I am so excited because it gives me more faith in myself.

Later on in the day we met with S.A.Y Yes! and to be quite honest I wasn’t really impressed. I think the way that they spoke about things might have bothered me a bit. I mean, I agree with the whole program, but I feel like they are a little of on some things. One of the things they said was that feelings don’t matter. He was trying to say that feelings should not have an influence on choices, but the truth is that they do. A person’s feeling reflects the choices that they make. The environment that they live in has an influence on their feelings and that has an influence on the choices that they make. And they need people to help them sort through their problems so that they can help them with the choices that they make.

Kaleo was incredible last night. I really felt the Holy Spirit on the group and it was awesome. I saw some of our students from the group really step up in leadership and that made me so happy. I think that they really have something going in Kaleo. They do not have a fluffy youth group where they do not learn anything, but instead they really are pushed. They push each other. It is awesome to see and I love how things are going.

01/08/11

Matthew 17

“I assure you that even if you have faith
as small as a mustard seed,
You could say to a mountain,
“move from here to there”
And it would move.
NOTHING WOULD BE IMPOSSIBLE.”
Matthew 17:20-21

As Christians, we often talk about this faith we have in a way that makes it seem so unreal. The faith that we have is so fake to me sometimes. If we truly believe in our God, we should be able to take bigger steps. We should be able to get out closer to that ledge. We should not be so skeptical, but we should see how big our God is and that nothing truly is impossible.

I see this in my own life. I think that I have enough faith, but it comes to a point where I am talking about whatever it is that I want to do and I am shut down by those around me. It becomes one of those things where people talk to me as if I am child and say, “oh...that’s a nice idea.” When God lays something on my heart, I should not be so discouraged by those people. I do not care how close they are to me or how much I respect them, God is bigger than any of them will ever be. That means that if God puts something on my heart then I need to run with it. I need to take it and go through with it. God will bring me through. He will help me even if no one else supports me.

Nothing is impossible with faith in the Lord. He is not in the small box that we put him in. He is so much bigger than we have ever made him out to be. He is so much more magnificent than we could ever imagine. We cannot wrap our minds fully around God, so how is it that we cannot have faith that he will pull us through? How is it that we can say, “eh...I don’t know if that will happen?” We can’t. We cannot put restraints on God...HE IS THE CREATOR OF THE UNIVERSE. When we create a universe, then we can talk.

Father God, I praise you for all that you have done for us. I praise you for your love, for you power. I praise you for ow you pour into us and love us unconditionally. I praise you for you will and for how you want to see this world become a better place. I praise you for the passions that you put on hearts. I praise you for how your hand is working in this place and for how you are working here. I praise you for your love for the city and love for the whole world. I praise you for your redeeming grace. I praise you Father God.

Father, I pray that you will continue to work in my heart. I pray that you will continue to show me who I am through the passions that you lay on my heart. I pray that God you will continue to push me. I pray that you will help me to see things through your eyes. I rebuke all the lies that tell me that I can’t do it. I rebuke the words of the faithless. I rebuke the words of the hopeless. God, I know that you can do whatever. I know that you can and are working through me. God, I pray that you will give me the strength that I need. I pray that you will give me the power I need. I pray that you will give me the love that I need.

I love you, Father.

Amen

Life in LA: Real Day 3

We went to Watts to do a service project today. At times I was a bit annoyed with the lack of help in my area, but now that I look back, we got a ton done. I am really excited for the Watts school to open. I cannot wait to see it be done and for kids to be in there. I cannot wait to see God work in so many ways that we cannot imagine. I cannot wait for people to come in and see the need and feel the want to teach. I know it seems impossible, but it is not. God can do this, he has the power to do this. I am praying that a flood of people will come in and will feel the need to go to this school. I pray that there will be a hunger in people’s hearts and that they will seek after that hunger. I am praying that they see the love that is needed in that community and they follow after that love. I pray that God will open the eyes of people and see the need in Watts and that people will follow that. I pray that God will break hearts and people will go to Watts. I pray that people will fall in love with Watts.

I am in love with Watts. I am in love with the community, the children, everyone. Jimmy is a great guy from Watts. I look at him and think to myself, “I don’t know how he does it.” I watch Jimmy interact with people in Watts and just see God. I see God’s love, God’s heart, and feel God’s presence when I am around Jimmy. I see him interact with kids who are not use to love and act accordingly and am in amazement. He loves them with all that he has and it is only by God that he can love them the way that he does. These kids are hurting and are in pain and it is awesome to see how much he loves them. I see Glenn work with the kids and love them. He encourages them when they need it and shows them tough love when they need it. He pushes them and helps them to become better than what they are. He loves his community and it shows through the way that he lives. I watch Keely and her sister and the way that they pour into people and see God’s heart. I see them pour into people that everyone else has already given up on. I see them caring and pushing people and it is awesome. Yesterday, I saw a bit of Andrea’s heart for Watts and it was awesome. I saw her love the community that she just became apart of and it is awesome. I saw her hope for the school and how it is so grounded in faith. I saw a beautiful heart that wants nothing but to do God’s will. I am excited for her to see where it goes.

These are the people that see me want LACS in Watts to happen. I see the faith and the love for their community and want nothing more than for LACS to accomplish so much. I see the kids and how they need so much and need love and get excited for LACS to open. I see the people who love this community and want other people to adapt that love. I cannot wait to see how God blesses this community. I cannot wait to see how LACS is blessed through these people and other people. It is such an exciting thing and I am so pumped for it. These kids need a school like this. They need a school that cares about their well being. They need a school that cares about their actual education. They need a school that will help them excel and that will show them the love that they deserve. I am excited about this and cannot wait for it all to work out. God is doing awesome things.

We had dinner at Lindsay, Lorraina, and Jennifer’s house last night. Megan was so nice to join us as well. Talking to Lindsay was really good for me. Listening to how she made her decision to come to WI was good for me. God was definitely talking to me through her. It was good to really hear how she loves this place and to see how she cares for the city. I am excited to see how God continues to bring me here.